There are peaks and valleys in every long-term relationship. If you and your partner are going through a dry spell—sex has become inconsistent, or seems to be completely off the table—it may be time to jump start your sex life. So how do other couples keep things hot in the bedroom? Here, are the top eight (8) habits of highly sexual couples.

THEY DON’T NEED IT TO BE PERFECT.

Life isn’t perfect, and neither is sex. Couples who have a lot of sex don’t look for the perfect situation, or the right time to have sex. In your everyday life, work stress, family stress, and money stress and all kinds of worries come into play. “Couples who have a lot of sex take advantage of any opportunity to rekindle the flame

THEY AREN’T SEXUALLY SELFISH.

While it’s easy to get lost in the desire to feel pleasure, sex is more likely to happen when both parties aren’t so selfish. Highly sexual couples aren’t self-centered. It’s not all about you or about them. They listen to what each other needs especially when it comes to sex. They are in-tune with each other’s sexual arousal and they deliver because pleasing each the other person makes sex better for both of them

THEY’RE COMFY IN THEIR SKIN.

Having more sex can come down to loving yourself, all of yourself, before making love to someone else. Those who feel comfortable with their bodies don’t get hung up on how their bodies look, feel, or smell to one another tend to enjoy se more. They feel at ease with one another which allows them to enjoy every sex act from kissing to rimming.

THEY TRUST EACH OTHER.

One key trait that highly sexual couples have in common also contributes to successful marriage: trust. You can’t be a highly sexual couple and have trust issues. Trust and intimacy walk hand in hand. It’s hard to have one without the other. Couples who have lots of sex, work through trust issues to strengthen their intimacy.

THEY DON’T RELY ON BEING IN THE MOOD.

Couples who get busy frequently don’t rely on being “in the mood,” because that might be something they rarely feel, especially when kids or a busy work schedule are in the picture. “If you’re not in the mood, sometimes a little foreplay can get you there.

THEY HAVE FUN.

If after a while the spark begins to fade and your sex life starts feeling like a routine, switch it up and laugh a little. Sexually active couples have fun. Sex doesn’t have to be super sensual, picture perfect and neat and tidy all the time. Sex can be fun and flirty. There can be laughter. The more open you are to having fun, the more you’ll likely have.

THEY ASK FOR WHAT THEY WANT.

No matter how many times you’ve had sex with your partner, it can sometimes be hard to voice what it is that turns you on, or even what you’d like more of. Well before sex, tell your partner something personal, something intimate about how you are feeling, what you would like to do to them. It could be anything from kissing their toes to cooking in your underwear. Just show that you are open to having a conversation about your sex life. This starts the sexual communication immediately.

THEY HAVE MORE IN COMMON THAN SEX.

Having a mutual love for getting it on isn’t all that sexually active couples have in common. Sharing hobbies and interests helps to maintain long-term passion. Highly sexual couples also tend to share core values and belief systems. In a general way they tend to be on the same page with things like religion, politics, finances, education, and the like.

This brings me to the biggest secret to maintaining passion in your romantic relationship and becoming more sexually active, BE WITH SOMEONE WHO LIKES YOU BACK.

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