Dear Mahogany, he had gonorrhea.
My boyfriend is an amazing guy and I love him so much. But early this year, we had a big problem, which made us take time off each other. During the break I wasn’t seeing anyone, but when we got back together, he told me he had a one night stand. It wasn’t a big deal to me, I forgave him all the same. But I insisted that he should get tested for any form of STI.
He took a test, and we found out he contracted gonorrhea from his one night stand. It turns out he doesn’t know the girl from anywhere, they met at a party. My boyfriend has been treated and cured of the infection. But I can’t move on. I’m scared of getting intimate with him again. I have a very huge phobia for STIs, so I am always very careful with whom I am intimate with. With or without a condom, I am still very scared to even kiss him. What do I do?
It was very brilliant for you to ask for a medical test after the both of you got back together. Relationships are built on trust, and I think that’s the problem here. The solution is communication. You need to have a heart to heart discussion with your partner. You said you are scared of getting intimate with your partner, even after he has been cleared of the disease. This because you have not let out how you feel about him getting the disease. You need to speak with him. In the main time, take things slowly between you two. Allow enough time for your emotions and feeling for him be nurtured back. You can start off by using a condom if sex happens. But most of all an open and honest communication with your boyfriend would do you good.